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What is it with kids sticking all kinds of stuff in their mouth holes? I’m not talking about unhealthy snacks here, I’m talking down right rank , weird and wacky stuff that is just not supposed to be ingested! They are like scavengers, willing to basically eat anything without question.
It might just be my kids, I’m hoping it’s ‘normal’?
Here are some of the gross crap I’ve found mine munching on.

Mud
My son was a regular consumer of mud and compost. We would be playing in the garden and he would turn round and it would be all sludgy seeping out his mouth. He would smile and his teeth and tongue would be caked it in. It used to do my head in, i’d run over and be baby wiping that all out of his mouth in horror, pleading with him to not eat it or it would make him sick. The boy couldn’t get enough, he’d be back ten minutes later shovelling it back in there. I got pretty worried about it, thinking he must be one of those people who have that condition where they eat bad stuff, fearing he would progress to hardcore debris like stones and glass (I looked this up and it FREAKED ME OUT!!!!). He eventually just stopped doing it. My daughter now does it. Lapping up that grimey goodness. I don’t stress it now, just leave her to it, within reason. its good enough for worms, clearly good enough for my kids too!

Play Doh
They love a bit of this brightly coloured salty blubber. It’s non toxic apparently so I guess its not the end of the world if they do tuck into this. The play Doh Company I feel don’t exactly try to discourage ingestion of their product, nearly all the accessories and packs you can buy to accompany and use alongside the dough itself, are food themed, making it look even more appealing and food like in appearance. From pizza parlour to ice cream factory they have it covered, although we have the dentistry set and my daughter ate the teeth my son had made and extracted from the mouth!

My daughter found some old dried put crusty play doh in the garden the other day. Even tried eating that.


Chalk
Yup, kids love this chalky goodness. Once it meets saliva is turns into a stream of creamy colour. Absolutely gross and gets everywhere. Apparently the IKEA ones are particularly appetizing going by my kids. The giant garden ones can serve 2!


Crayons
Its so gross when your kid eats these, you can see the waxy curls on their teeth. We had an unfortunate run in with an ingested crayon once…. that’s another blog, but for the record, a consumed crayon WILL change the colour of your poo!

Bath sponges
In my house a sponge has 5 uses to my kids….
1) To stick stuff in, like pencils, fingers, lego people etc.
2) To use as a drinking receptacle. Soak up water and suck it out
3) A food stuff, bite a chunk of sponge and eat it
4) As a water bomb… soak up water and throw at mum whilst she is bathing us
5) Its actual intended use


Board books
They make these for babies so they can’t rip the pages and ruin the book, however we have yet to own one that doesn’t get mauled in the corners and end up a soggy, half eaten, swollen mess at the edges. No pages ripped , however half the book in my baby’s gut!


Sticks
Not just for dogs, both mine as toddlers liked to suck and/or chew on a stick. Sometimes after digging the ground with it for a while, thus getting daily dose of mud too. Yummerific.


Food packaging

Most food packets have ended up in my kids mouths but over the years a few firm favourites have emerged.
1) Up in top place is the cupcake case. This one is understandable. There is cake residue in the case, a good old chew on this is next best thing to more cake.
2) Foil wrapper. Like above this often will have chocolate residue but once this gets into your mouth there is no going back. It disintegrates and breaks into pieces and its a damn nightmare to get out of your kids mouth and teeth
3) The faithful lolly stick. We’ve all been there. Only my kids take it to savage new levels and gnaw that stick until its splintered in pieces


Sand
This is just plain wrong. The gritty texture of this and sound of it grinding between your child’s teeth is enough to make you cringe. Can’t take a toddler to the sand pit or the beach without them treating themselves to a mouthful of this salty maker of glass. I’m sure we can all recall a trip to the beach where a stray grain has made it into our sarnie. Why on earth anyone would seek this experience out is totally beyond me.


Clothing

My daughter hasn’t done this yet but my son is quite a frequent chewer of clothing. He is like a moth, plaguing our wardrobes with little holes made by his teeth. Does it to his own clothes and when being a real pain, will grab your top in his teeth too.


Baby wipes

Thankfully not managed to get hold of a poo ridden one, but prior to me using reusable wipes both my kids had given a good old water wipe a run for its money. Sucking the moisture out and then dragging and pulling it whilst gripping it with their teeth, like a dog with a rope toy. Not sure if all brands of wipes would do, but those water wipes do say they contain fruit extract so who knows. Maybe the kids are on to something?


Other stuff my kids have eaten…. raw potato, food off the floor in the street, drinks coasters, toilet roll and cotton wool. Also quite partial to sticking their entire mucky paws in there too!


What random crap have your kids eaten?

Pictures are a combination of authors own and free images from unsplash

3 Replies to “Stuff kids eat”

  1. Chalk… chalk is the worst!!!
    Another challenge I’m currently facing… is the 2yr old feeding baby wipes to the dog 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

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